Reconciliation does not happen if you keep on digging up old dirt. If you wish to resolve a dispute, you should not repeatedly go over what has happened before. You have to bury the past.
In order to reconcile, forgive and forget, and to tolerate others you have to focus on the positives and overlook the negatives. This is what we learn from the Qurʾān and hadīth and this should be our approach in everything.
[This short excerpt is based on a lecture delivered by Shaykh Riyadh ul Haq on Friday 22nd November 2019]
JazakAllah for this important reminder. I was fortunate enough to be able to listen to this talk and found it extremely beneficial masha’Allah. This is an important topic and Shaykh gave us a beautiful example of reconcilalation and forgiveness through the story of Abu Bakr (ra) and Mistah bin Uthatha. I pray that we can all learn to live by the Qur’anic verse that was discussed:
Let them forgive and overlook. Do you not wish that Allah should forgive you? Verily! Allah is Oft-forgiving, Most Merciful.” (24:22)
Shaykh once mentioned in Dars once that being optimistic is a character of a mu’min.
It’s very easy to be pessimistic however as shaykh has mentioned previously if you constantly think and be negative then your brain gets wired to always think negatively and it’s very difficult to think otherwise.
May Allāh give us the ability to reflect on the positives rather than the negatives